A light, airy, effervescent, blog of grave consequence. (NOT!) Dedicated to those of us who must respond to negative stimuli by Chernobyling (entombing in concrete) our innermost thoughts.

Location: Slaughter, Louisiana, United States

A semi-gruntled corporate reliability engineer trying to make ends meet while keeping my wife happy, and myself out of the asylum.

Thursday, March 31, 2005

Kinky Friedman for Governor.

Latest story here.

Some of his best lyrics below:

We Reserve the Right to Refuse Service to You
(Kinky Friedman, Rick Goldberg, J. Maizel)

While traveling through the Lone Star State
I lost my lunch before I ate,
It happened in a pull-ahead café. Yahoo!
I felt my bones begin to crunch
I saw my name on the businessman’s lunch
And the neck who owned the place stepped up to say:
“Hey buddy, are you blind, Say, partner, can’t you read the sign ?”

We reserve the right to refuse service to you,
Take your business back to Walgreen’s,
Have you tried your local zoo?
You smell just like a communist,
You come on through just like a Jew,
We reserve the right to refuse service to you.

Well, I walked on in to my House of God
Congregation on the nod,
Just chosen folks are doing their weekly thing.
Hear, O Israel, yes indeed,
My book was backwards, couldn’t read,
But I got a good rise when I heard that Rabbi sing,
“Boruch atoh Adonoi,
What the hell are you doing back there, boy ?”

We reserve the right to refuse services to you,
Your friends are all on welfare — You call yourself a Jew?
You need your ticket and your tie
To zip your prayers on through,
We reserve the right to refuse services unto you.

Life from Laos and Cambodia
No more tears tonight they showed ya
The latest old war movies on TV.
You know it’s bound to escalate
So go and turn on channel eight,
Watch channel seven border channel three.
Well, I won’t mind your tanks and jets and jeeps
And speaking on behalf of all my fellow creeps:

We reserve the right to refuse service to you,
Right, face, forward, move
And get the children, too.
Let Saigons be bygones,
Don’t you blow this world in two.
We reserve the right to refuse service to you.

Well, it’s just my luck that God’s a Texan
One big sonbitchin’ Anglo-Saxon,
Some crazy tall Norwegian bore
Just to help my body shipped air-freight
From Texas to the Pearly Gate
Just ring the bell and leave me at the door.
I’ll be somewhere over Jordan swinging low,
I’ll hear them tape-recorded angels in lifelike stereo

Singing, “We reserve the right to refuse service to you,
Take your business back to Walgreen’s,
Have you tried your local zoo ?
Our quota’s filled for this year
On singing Texas Jews,
We reserve the right to refuse service to you.”

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Must be going well in Iraq.

I haven't heard anything negative about our progress in Iraq in several days. I guess not enough of our guys are dying for this 'mistake' to interest the media.

I'd also like to know if the general slant of all news coverage has become more favorable toward the war since Dan the man left cBS news.

OK. So next time there will be no raises for ANYONE!

The Supreme Court today sided with the party herafter to be known as the "Whining Civil Servants" in their age discrimination case against the City of Jackson, MS. Read the opinion here.

In an attempt to bring its civil starting salaries into line with the national average, the City granted all of its certain employees raises. Since the starting salaries were so low, but the average raises had been slightly better than national average, the employees with less than five years service received a higher percentage raise than the WCS's did. Since most of the WCS's who are over 40 have more than five years of service, they sued for disparate impact and WON. (Even though they would still have been making more money than before and would most likely be OVER the national average for compensation based upon experience.)

I hope the city fires the whole lot of them and contracts the jobs to the highest non-union bidder.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005


Johnny Cochran has died.

He was in a hospice suffering from a neurological problem.

I wonder if he couldn't afford a good enough lawyer to keep his family from pulling his feeding tube?

Monday, March 28, 2005

It's hard to lampoon people who are so consistant

From Jay Nordlinger's Impromptus at National Review Online:

In his New York Sun column, John P. Avlon quoted the Rev. Jesse Jackson, preaching/speechifying in the Riverside Church. "Whose god is God?" said Jackson. "There is a profound theological debate in our nation tonight about the nature and character of God. . . . Today the Congress reconvenes to save a woman — Terri Schiavo — from starving to death, but then votes to starve millions every day. Whose god is God? They fight to save the fetus, and then starve the babies. Whose god is God?"
Reported Avlon, "Enthusiastic applause rolled through the pews . . ." No doubt, no doubt.
Jackson further said, "There is a fascist attack on civil rights and civil liberties. We cannot be silent."

I called it!

Saturday, March 26, 2005


Duke is out!

that is all.

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Here's something.

I don't think I've heard this vocalized anywhere else yet.

Would the same thing be happening to Terri Schiavo if she were in the exact same situation but she were black?

I'd wager that Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson would be down there in a second, if only to babble about how black children are starved everyday in the US because of racist republican policies.

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

One more thing.

I wonder if any of the poeple voicing opinions on each side of the Starve Schiavo arguments would change their positions if this debate were being had minus the fifteen year interim?

If she were just put into that state two months ago, and we still had the benefit of all the legal wrangling that has preceeded this point, would everybody still be of the same opinions?

Looking ahead, will it become OK to starve someone twenty minutes after they are determined to be in a "persistent vegatative state" because we will have already exhausted all of the legal arguments against feeding that type of person and set this precedent?

And if people's positions were to change with a shorter time period, who then decides what time period is appropriate?

Phew. Ethics suck.

That's it. Groundhog stew tomorrow.

6-10" of snow on the way. Yip-frigging-eee.

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Maybe the track project needs a cutesie name?

The "Utopia" project in Preston, (Just up the trail a piece from 'Big Satellite Parking Lot'), sounds pretty good. See letters here, and here. Articles Here.

Maybe the dog-track developers should re-name their efforts, "Bringing jobs and lower taxes to all, even you ungrateful, xenophobic, regressive nitwits."

I'd bet the good citizens of B.S P.L. would vote against Utopia, too.

Monday, March 21, 2005

Schiavo, on the other hand...

Maybe we should just back off this thing and put her out of his misery.

I mean, a legal precedent that allows for the killing of people you find burdensome could be rather useful at times, couldn't it?

Sunday, March 20, 2005

Governor down...

I see that Rowland received a year prison sentence for his financial misdeeds. Not bad.

When he gets out he'll be good to run for Mayor of Providence.

Friday, March 18, 2005

Some victory.

Terry Schiavo's feeding tube has been removed. She will starve to death over the course of the next few weeks.

For me, at least the story will be out of the media so we can get back to important topics... You know, like the Michael Jackson Trial.

Where are all the women's groups? You'd think that this dude wanting to starve his invalid wife so he can get remarried would be considered the ultimate patriarchal power play.

Or maybe they think this is just another case of "Freedom of Choice".

Wednesday, March 16, 2005


Here's a little time waster. The red star is where I ended up. Take the quiz here.

Thanks to CynicalNation for the link.

Image hosted by

Random Question

Do any parents still read Maurice Sendak or Shel Silverstein to their children?

I hope so.

He's no OJ...

Robert Blake is found Not Guilty of murder and solicitation of murder for that lady (his wife) being shot in his car at a restaurant a few years back.

I haven't followed the trial, but whatever.

Monday, March 14, 2005

The battle is joined.

The ire over the Plainfield track proposal continues. Here are a couple letters. One that Perry Rose wrote here.

And a response from an idiot here.

Now. Ms. Finnemore, whose residence I'm unable to confirm, so she might have her primary residence in Florida like the head of one of the anti-track groups does, assumes, as all well indoctrinated liberals do, that anyone who disagrees with her must be unintelligent. And I quote, "It is the educated verses the uneducated." Hey stupid! Verses are in songs, VERSUS means pitted against. At least use a spell check when you're being condescending. It didn't work for John and Tuhraisa last autumn. It won't work for you now.

Ms. Finnemore also seems scandalized that Perry would compare Plainfield to, Mexico, of all places. Perry's right on that one. I'll bet that Mexico has seen better than 2:1 new jobs created for every job Plainfield has shed over the last 25 years and since the advent of NAFTA.

The Pro-track families have good, sound, revenue based arguments for supporting the track. They have seen industry after industry flee from Connecticut because of its tax laws and out-of-control energy costs. They are smart enough to know that this state has already ceased to be attractive to new industry and are willing to put themselves on the line to support ANYONE who might bring about a less burdensome tax rate in the future. Let alone the jobs that would be created.

The anti-track people seem to have only one argument. And I quote again, "
The educated people in town understand the C-5 zone change is wrong; it is unnecessary for the town to progress. Those who are opposed to this zone change comprehend that the end result will be disastrous to our town." Their argument is that the zoning change is wrong and will be disastrous. Not that it will decrease property values, (Low taxes usually result in higher property values.), would create an eyesore, (Have these people seen the dog-track?) or cause other businesses to fail, (tourist traffic is generally good for local businesses. Just ask Litchfield.)

The last time I heard anyone get away with a restrictionist argument like that one, I think a certain segment of the population had to sit at the back of busses. I mean really. Doesn't Ms. Finnemore sound like she's holding her nose while deigning to pat all those uneducated people on their heads and show them the error of their collective ignorance. Her stance is the same as those people who opposed the equal rights amendment in the 60's. "Only I know what's best for you, please don't try to improve yourself or your lot in life. You aren't human enough to make these important decisions. Just stay where you are and enjoy being counted as 2/3 of a citizen. Let us (She'd probably say "us" instead of "we") grownups handle everything. Just keep sending in those taxes."

The only argument against the track seems to be, "since I have figured out a way to not pay taxes up here by having a second home in a different state as a primary residence, I don't want anything to change ever." That's an excellent rejoinder if I've ever heard one. Touche. I am skewered by their rapier analysis.

Anyway, I'm going to try MY hand at letter-writing. This one is post-dated a couple years. Let's see what Ms. Finnemore will think when she receives this in her mailbox:

Date: 25 June, 1876, errrr, I mean 2010
From: Skip Hayward
Re: Transfer of Sovereignty

To whom it may concern:

Thank you for your patience while we worked out the last remaining kinks in the transactional paperwork. We hope to complete this as quickly as possible now that the road ahead has been paved by our anti-expansionist allies.

Since the town of Plainfield, now known by its Native American name: Big Satellite Parking Lot, defaulted on its financial obligations to the state, our tribe has stepped forward with an offer to take over the operations of the town. We will begin our control of your town as of midnight tonight as the Tribe has covered your back debts to the state in exchange for your land.

Thankfully for the townspeople, over the last few years our allies have thwarted any attempts to improve the fiscal infrastructure of the town thereby making it a prime target for our "buyout." If the town had been solvent, the Tribe couldn't have pursued its support as aggressively.

The only domiciles left in the town are vacation and second homes for people who have other options, so there will be very few involuntary displacements when the bulldozers show up tomorrow morning. Those of you who wish to remain will be forcibly relocated to a reservation near Uncasville. Our competitors have a few acres of land left from the Nuclear facility that you will be allowed to use for a nominal fee. This fee will be in the range of 400 mil. Which is significantly less than the property tax rate you've enjoyed for the last two years while living in Big Satellite Parking Lot.

We thank you for your cooperation in this time of transition.

Best Regards,

Skip Hayward, President of the State of Mashantucket, AKA The state formerly know as Connecticut.

Not bad for one of the "uneducated." Hmmmmm?

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Hmmmmm. Reparations anyone?

I know that this is not relevant to the slave reparations case, but anyone wanna bet that it's going to be brought up?

U.S. settles in Gold Train dispute:

[World News]: MIAMI, March 11 : The United States made a formal agreement to pay $25.5 million to Hungarian Jewish refugees and others whose valuables were stolen aboard the Gold Train.

The settlement will cover basic humanitarian services for Hungarian Holocaust survivors throughout the world, The Miami Herald reported.

The agreement is subject to approval next week by U.S. District Judge Patricia Seitz in Miami.

The loot aboard the Gold Train was plundered from the Jews by the Nazis during World War II.It was loaded aboard 40 freight cars that were eventually turned over to American soldiers in Austria in 1945.

The paintings, oriental rugs, jewelry and gold was supposed to be turned over to the Jews who owned them or their survivors, but the loot was diverted.

Investigations showed some of it turned up in generals' hands and some was sold for relief.

The situation was not revealed for several years, and when it was, the suit was filed by the survivors and relatives of victims.

- -- Copyright 2005 by United Press International.

Damned Groundhog...

Sheesh. Another eight inches of snow. This is getting ridiculous. The season started out pretty lame but it seems to be progressing to the mean as one would expect.

Thank God for four wheel drive.

Although it hadn't seemed to help the dude in the little SUV who lost control on the way down the 202 hill into Torrington this morning and smacked drivers' side first into the phone pole and blocked up all the traffic on my way to the bank.

Friday, March 11, 2005

An Equine Tale.

Thanks to Jonah Goldberg in National Review, I now have a new management-type slogan. "Stop holding your horses."

Here's the relavent background story - "At the outset of World War II, Britain was still scrounging for any weapons it could get its hands on, and so de-mothballed a piece of light field artillery from the Boer War. The five-man crew it rounded up had a curious system for firing the armament: Precisely three seconds prior to discharging the gun, two of the men would snap to attention until all was silent again. None of the experts or young officers consulted could deduce the point of the exercise. Finally, they brought in a wizened retired artillery colonel. He watched the exercise for a moment, then, jarred by an old memory, recognition flickered in his eyes: “I have it. They are holding the horses.”

I see this so often. Stuff that is done simply because that's how it's always been done. Find these problems and you'll find waste you can eliminate.

RSS Feed Available

For those of you who check this site now and again. There is an RSS feed available to track my updates without having to stop by every five minutes. The link is as follows:

Just get an RSS decoder like this one: Sharpreader

And you can track updates to site you read without constantly refreshing your screen or wasting time stopping by if I haven't posted anything in a day or two.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Elite pronunciation

Did someone recently change the spelling of, "Neanderthals?" I heard it pronounced as , "neandertols" twice today on different documentaries. (Yeah, I know, real cool to watch more than one program about ancient humans in one day.)

Anyway, I wonder if this foppy articulation is an outgrowth of the tendency of editorialists, errr, journalists to elocute the capitals of foreign countries in the foreign country's native language even though the reporter is speaking in English? Notice the next time some idiot on CNN says "Gutter" when he means "Qatar" or "Mumbai" when he means Bom-frigging-bay.

They're inconsistent at best in this pursuit. I never hear them say "Paree" or "Ciudad de México."


Monday, March 07, 2005

Dan Rather's Legacy

I heard a blurb on the radio this morning about how, even with the "Fake but Accurate" documents that he posed to the nation during the election, "Dan Rather's legacy will be untarnished in the history books."

Of course. But the people who write the history texts these days are pinkos as well, no?

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Random thoughts.

Recently, while pondering what Mount Rushmore will look like with Ronald W. Reagan's and George W. Bush's busts on it, I thought of a line from MASH. It was actually written and delivered by Alan Alda as a sardonic comment, but look at the Middle East today and imagine if it would be a better or worse place if the following came true:

"I don't know why they're shooting at us. All we want to do is bring them democracy and white-bread. Transplant the 'American Dream'. Freedom, achievement, hyperacidity, affluence, flatulence, technology, tension. The inalienable right to an early coronary sitting at your desk while plotting to stab your boss in the back. Now that's entertainment."

Entertainment indeed.

Friday, March 04, 2005

Corporate Priorities.

I'm watching a documentary about Boeing's Everette, Washington facility. It's pretty fascinating. One tiny thing struck me.

The facility director was talking about the number of vehicles in the plant. Trucks, bikes, trikes, carts etc. He made the offhand comment, " We don't have many accidents but I'll bet we have a lot of near-misses that don't get reported."

By itself, that sounds about like most shops, but when I started thinking about my own plant, I was struck by how much farther advanced we are than Boeing in terms of safety. We have spent the last four or so years encouraging people to report ALL near-misses, no matter how minor. We have been able to find potential safety problems and fix them before they caused an injury.

Another part of the documentary focused on the "Toyota" like assembly line that Boeing uses on their jets. They were very proud that they could tell if the airplane was behind schedule by where it stood on the shop floor.

I wonder, though, If Boeing is truly practicing Jidoka, how can they expect honest feedback about the assembly line progress if their employees aren't comfortable enough to report potential safety hazards? Do the employees cover up potential issues with the airplanes in order to keep the plane on schedule or are they actually empowered and supported to the point that they feel they can Determine there is a problem, STOP the production line, Fix the immediate issue, then fall back and determine and implement a permanent fix?

I'm probably reading too much into the two minutes of TV I just watched, but it was an interesting disconnect voiced by the Boeing plant management.

Boy, some people..

Martha Stewart Omnimedia stock has tripled since the insider-trader was imprisoned. She was released today and the stock was up another $3 per share. Odd thing is that the company has lost money consistently for the last several years and shows no sign of returning to profitability any time soon.

I wish I would've shorted it. It would've been nice to take all those adoring fans' money.

Microsoft comments.

I think we can all agree that Win98 was an iffy at best operating system. XP seems to be a bit more stable, if bloated. But I found a flaw in XP last evening that I consider pretty significant.

Purchase a FULL copy (Not upgrade) of XP. It say right on the box "For computers with No operating System." So, I booted up a DOS disk, Fdisked C: until it submitted, and tried to load my new version of XP.

Unfortunately, there is nothing on the XP CD that can be read in a DOS environment. So, if you have a computer with no operating system, you can't load XP until you install some operating system that can decode HTML or whatever else Microsoft is trying to do.

I ended up re-installing W98 so I could install XP even though it said I should have been able to load XP onto a computer with no OS.

You'd think they'd give you a 3.5" floppy to boot from that couldstart the process like they did in W98?

Oh well, I guess I shouldn't be too surprised.

Thursday, March 03, 2005

Sexism at Lexis-Nexis?

I keep hearing people reference Lexis-Nexis when they are trying to research the media history of a fact or story. I went to their site and looked at all of their information sources. Four of the sources start with the word "Men", Over 325 of their sources start with "Women".

I guess the media just figures women need more information? I'm probably missing the larger point, but it's pretty interesting to see the list of titles.

Not that I've been overly prolific here lately,

But there may be a lull. I installed a new 160GB hard drive in my home system last night and during the clean-up and system re-arrange, I discovered that all of the versions of XP that I have no longer will register properly. Poo. I may actually have to purchase a microsoft product directly instead of receiving it pre-installed.

Ah well. On another note, I finally retired the first hard drive I ever bought. It is a Seagate Fireball, 6.4GB and has been running continuously since March of 1997. It was a $300 adder to the system I bought back then. Now it's not even large enough to hold the entire Windows operating system. But it still runs. (For reference, the 160GB Seagate (which formatted to only 149GB for some reason) I just bought cost $92.)

So, now I have to find an operating system and rebuild the entire system from scratch. The only good news was I was able to backup all my important data files prior to the debacle.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Not today Fred.

I usually go along with Fred Reed, but In a recent essay about the suicide of Hunter Thompson, Fred may have missed the mark.

His ultimate paragraph is as follows, "You can see why he ate his gun. Everything he hated has returned. Nixon is back in the White House, Rumsnamara risen from the dead, bombs falling on other peoples’ suburbs. The Pentagon is lying again and democracy stalks yet another helpless country. This time the young are already dead and there will be no joyous anarchy. The press, housebroken, pees where it is told. But he gave it a hell of a try."

Personally, given the recent events with Syria, Egypt, Lebanon, Iraq, Israel, the palestinians, etc., I think Thompson was smart enough to realize that everything he thought, everything he based his writings and life upon was about to be proven incorrect. And he couldn't accept it.

I can only hope more of the glitterati follow in his footsteps.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

MLB Joke of the year

I just heard what the new Steroid policy is for Major League Baseball.

If you flunk a random drug test FOUR times, you get suspended for a year.

Better odds to hit the Mega-Millions jackpot, I think.

Bulk up kiddies. You'll never make it on your merits.

More snow...

Man, the state plows are doing a lousy job on the roads I travel this year. I wish, since they don't seem to want to actually clear the roads, that they would stop throwing down sand and salt. All it does is turn a passable hardpack of snow into an unsafe river of grooved slush that grabs your car and throws it wherever it feels.